Love Diagnosis

At one point in my life…for a solid two years, House was my absolute favorite television show. I have a thing for medical dramas and “who-done-its” and House, in my opinion, perfectly merged the two tropes. Every season there would be a couple of episodes where House would tell a story so his team or medical students could try to diagnose a patient.  House would give a scenario and the students would have to deduce the correct treatments needed to help the patient.

We’re gonna do a bit of that here in this article. I’m going to give a completely fictitious scenario and I need you all to “diagnose” the situation.

Here we go.

There was a young man who was a attracted to a young lady. Let’s say he had been pursuing her for a number of years, but never made much progress in a relationship. The guy thinks the attraction is mutual but isn’t exactly sure but won’t directly ask for fear of outright rejection. He thinks that if he can just stay in the picture then eventually either she’ll come around and he’ll win her heart or there will be a zombie apocalypse and every other man will will die, and he wins by default. Either way works for him. He just wants to be around.

This guy is a glutton for punishment apparently and sticks around for a couple years going through a whole back and forth. He dates other women and she dates other men. Every so often they hangout and times are enjoyable. He tells her he wants to be with her, she is hesitant. That’s always how it goes.

Eventually the guy gives up and decides to genuinely just pursue a friendship. They continue to talk and hangout but for him she’s now the homie. Only thing is, she begins to develop feelings for the guy. At this point he assumes she likes him like she likes all of her friends and he’s cool with that. But, she may actually like him more than that.

She begins to go through the entire vetting process women do in 21st Century dating which can include a number of different Google searches, sex offender database searches, dating website searches and finally a social media profile review.

All of the search turn up clean, the guy is indeed a good guy. Only thing, he does seem to flirt a lot on Twitter. Nothing creepy, nothing sexual but his mentions usually are filled with women. This is a problem for her and she let’s the guy know he messed up. She doesn’t like him talking to a lot of different women online or otherwise. She wants to feel special. The guy is confused.

Good readers let’s help this completely made up guy out. Did he actually do something wrong? What should his next step be?  What advice can you give this guy who is definitely not me?

I enjoy train wrecks so I’d tell guy to stand outside her apartment with a boom box playing some simpish song by Babyface, while I UStreamed the event from the bushes. So Im probably not the best person to give advice.

What do normal people think? How would a normal person diagnose the situation?


About Author


I'm a thirty year old man who likes Medicine For Melancholy.

1 Comment

    • Ruth Jeremiah
      May 6, 2013

      I’m just cracking up at your making very clear that this isn’t you. Will be back for thoughts later but at first blush, there seems to be a lot of miscommunication between these two.


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