So last week I set myself up for a post this week by tweeting the following:
It’s Thursday and I’ve got nothing new at ThaWell. Got a good one coming next week. In the meantime, here’s a repost: http://t.co/SvEbMqy4zT
— W (@WalkSays) March 5, 2015
Sounds like I was gonna come with some heat, right? Yeah… So here’s the thing. I was planning on writing this really detailed article about how we Millennials have attempted to ruin all life with the ridiculous (and new-to-me) practice of women proposing to men. I had found some articles about it and even found a wiki-how detailing how a woman should propose to a man.
The problem is that after I sat down and thought all that through, I couldn’t think of anything to say about it other than that it’s weird and you shouldn’t do it.
Seriously, if a man hasn’t proposed to his girlfriend, it’s most likely because he doesn’t want to be married yet. According to my calculations, not wanting to be married yet is an excellent reason for not asking someone to marry you yet… Also, I’d laugh at you, bro. Hard. Congrats on being emasculated. Like, for real, look at that picture at the top of this post and tell me it doesn’t look like she also cuts up his food for him. She makes all the big decisions, which is proven by the fact that she just made the biggest decision in their collective lives. So yeah, he’s done. May as well sign him up for an express castration.
So there you have it… In the meantime I’d like to give you some random thoughts:
- OJ did it. Duh.
- President Obama is a terrorist Muslim whose master plan was to gain the trust of the American people, be elected president, and then make health care readily available to everybody. It’s true; Fox News told me so.
- Mary J. Blige had no business being on tonight’s episode of Empire. I’ll ignore Jennifer Hudson’s pointlessness. Get Mary up outta here.
- Shonda Rhimes roped me into Scandal with a brilliant first season. The show sucks now. And I have to watch, because I have to know what happens despite how ridiculous it is. I’m a victim. I should sue.
- The San Francisco 49ers, my favorite NFL team, apparently hate me. I don’t know what they’re doing this offseason, but their hatred for me is obvious.
- Kevin Durant’s injured foot also hates me.
- Also in the long line of things that hate me are Mondays, meetings that last longer than an hour, onions, 4:57am, mushrooms, 2nd hand cigarette smoke, water spots on my dishes, laundry, most seafood, and my failed attempt at being 6’3″.
I say that to say this: don’t propose to your boyfriend.